Transitions are hard. And to be frank, I’ve never been very good at transitioning. I’ve always been the kind of person who gets caught up in missing what was, worrying about what will be, and fretting over every detail of the process. I know it’s a choice. A rather unconscious habit that I’ve developed, but still it’s a choice to traverse transitions in this way.
I would prefer to choose embracing transitions. To be overcome with excitement about the future possibilities. To see what is in the past as the beautiful building blocks that brought me to where I am now. I want to choose to allow myself to trust that the Universe will guide me through each of those minute details. I would love to see transitions as an opportunity for growth and exploration rather than a “time to get through”.
Practicing Transitioning with Ease & Grace
Transitions are hard. I know I’m not the only one who struggles with them. Why are they so hard? Because they are filled with the unknown. As humans, we like what we know, what we are comfortable with. Is the unknown really that scary though? Where does that fear come from? I think this is the first step to making transitions easier. Recognizing and understanding our fears helps us to see past what is on the surface and get down to the root of the problem.
Often times what we say or think that we fear is just a cover story for what really lies beneath. In times like this, the best thing to do is ask yourself, “Why?”.
“Why am I afraid?”
“Why does this bother me?”
“Why am I feeling this way?”
Once you start to find the hidden fears, start asking yourself if they are true. So many things that we tell ourselves are not actually true, they are just our opinions or beliefs that we hold. Question them and ask yourself if you still want to believe this.
Asking questions like this helps you get past what lies on the surface and focuses your attention to the deeper issues. The more you probe yourself, the more likely you will get to the real issue. Once you are able to address the real issue from a place of love and compassion, you will feel so much lighter. This is wonderful to do as a journaling exercise. The act of putting pen to paper is not only cathartic, but it has a way of helping you to see things more clearly than when you are just thinking in your head.
Maybe it will look something like this…
“Why do I feel so alone on this adventure? Because I’m traveling by myself and it feels like everyone else is so far away.
Why does this bother me? Because the people that I love are what make my life worth living. Their presence lifts me up.
Why is this any different than before? It’s really not. I still see people that I care about while I’m traveling and I can still call them on the phone. It feels different because I’m no longer where I was but they are still where they were. I can picture them doing things I used to do or going places I used to go, except now I’m not there.
Why does this bother me? It feels like without me being there, we will grow apart.
Is this true? No. Relationships don’t require us to be there in person to remain strong, especially ones that are already established. They require work and maybe in different ways then before, but love knows no boundaries.
How do I move forward? I will trust in the power of love in my relationships and I will make more phone calls to people I love so I continue to feel connected to them.”
Whatever transition you are going through in your life, know that it is not the first or last one you will walk through. Reflect on what strategies helped you in past transitions and try out this journaling exercise to release your fears. Try to remember that you have a choice in how you will travel this challenging time. I will leave you with one of my favorite quotes about fear from Marianne Williamson:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
Peace and love to you as you transition with ease & grace ♥
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Disclaimer: The information in this post is not intended as medical advice, or to replace a one-on-one relationship with a qualified health care professional. Marcelle encourages you to make your own health care decisions based upon your research, and in partnership with your doctor, licensed dietitian, or nutritionist. The information provided in this post and the entire contents of www.marcellephene.com are based upon the opinions of Marcelle Phene and are for general educational purposes, and have not been reviewed nor approved by the FDA. You are solely responsible for your health care and activity choices.